Dorothy Gone Wild
Continuing from part 3 The Shadow Dancing Situation
Keisha: “Right, well I’m calling the police. This is harassment!”
To be continued……..
Ralph thought he’d seen it all. He was wrong.
Dorothy had officially lost whatever was left of her mind.
It started on a Wednesday. Ralph pulled into the carport, after a long day off from work he needed thirty minutes of peace. He had just cracked open a cold beer when he heard it:
VROOOOM! VROOOOM! VROOOOM!
He looked to his right. Dorothy had backed her 2005 Buick into her driveway and was revving the engine like she was about to street race. Going nowhere fast.
She was staring directly at him through the bushes, one hand on the steering wheel, the other hanging out the window all casual. Can’t forget about the star of the evening her bonnet was still visible even in the dim evening light.
Ralph: “Is she…”
VROOOOM! VROOOOM!
She revved it again, harder this time, then gave him a little wave with a seductive smile when she thought he was looking.
Ralph grabbed his phone and texted:
Ralph: “Baby. Come outside. Don’t ask questions. Just come.”
Keisha came outside.
Keisha: “What now—”
They both watched as Dorothy revved her engine again, she realized Keisha was outside, and immediately put her car in park and SPRINTED into her house. The front door slammed so hard it echoed down the street.
Her car was still running in the driveway.
Keisha’s mouth fell open.
Keisha: “Did she just… did that grown woman just run inside soon as I come outside?”
Ralph: “Every time.”
Keisha: (every time) “Her car is still ON, Ralph!”
They watched as Dorothy’s bedroom window blinds had a cracked open slightly. She peeked out, saw Keisha was still there, she shut the blind and stepped back.
Five minutes later, Mr. Fred had to walk over and turn Dorothy’s car off because she was too scared to come out.
But that was just the beginning.
The next day, Ralph was in his truck, trying to enjoy a moment of silence, when he heard a banging noise. Like someone hammering something.
BANG! BANG! BANG!
He looked over. Dorothy was on her porch, “fixing” her railing with a hammer. She wasn’t actually fixing anything—just hitting the wood randomly while staring at him.
BANG! BANG!
She smiled at him. Winked. Hit the wood rail with her hammer again.
Ralph texted his sister (his actual sister, Monica): “I think I’m being stalked by a woman in a bonnet with a hammer.”
Monica: “What?”
Ralph: “Yeah, you read it correctly.”
When Keisha came outside to water the plants, Dorothy seen Keisha and turned her nose up dropped the hammer and walked inside, leaving the hammer behind.
Keisha: “She’s like a cartoon character wearing a bonnet and wants to look crazy and run away whenever I show up.”
TO BE CONTINUED…