"Girl, you won't believe the mess I'm dealing with over here. I'm so fed up with Kyle's lazy behind, I just can't with him. You know how the yard has been looking like a jungle it’s about to be a month not even a leaf picked up. Well, I finally have had enough broke and hired one of those lawn care companies to come take care of it.
Whenever I asked Kyle about it probably a hundred times basically all month- 'Babe, when are you going to mow the lawn? The neighbors are going to start leaving nasty notes on the door.' But does he listen? Of course not! He says “Who cares what the neighbors think” then he just plops himself down on that ugly recliner, cracks open another beer, and mumbles something about getting to it 'tomorrow.' Which will be the next day then the next day then it’s the next month you see where I’m going with this?
Well, as we know tomorrow never friggin' comes with him anymore. I swear, he’s so attached to that lazy boy recliner, one day he’s going to come home from work tired and wanna kick the funky shoes off. “Having the living room smelling like burnt popcorn”. What?!! Girl you lying? her friend said. Yeah girl thinking about that smell makes me wanna vomit.
What was we talking about oh that stupid lazy boy. He going to be so tired and when walk in and see just the seat cushion now sit your butt down. I could hear him now. “Umm baby where the lazy boy recliner my mom brought? What you gone tell him girl? her friend replied.
“I’m going to say it’s in the bathroom you was in that you didn’t clean after you used it.
Not the bathroom JoAnn?
Yes, don’t even get me started on the bathroom...oh my god, the smell! I'm not exaggerating, Tina, it is nasty with a capital N-A-S-T-Y.
I shouldn't be surprised though. Kyle hasn't willingly taken a bath since...honestly, I can't even remember the last time. I have to practically threaten him telling him I’m going to call your momma. And you know that saying 'cleanliness is next to godliness'? Well he must be living in eternal damnation or something because he is far, far away from godly. Girl you are crazy!
I'm at my wit's end here. This man couldn't be productive if his life depended on it. If it were up to him, we'd be living in a rundown, smelly shack. Thank goodness I work and can afford to hire some real men to do a man's job around here. I swear, his one foot is already out the door and if this keeps up much longer?...."
To be continued…….